Indeed, when an account of a person's life written by that person [autobiography] or when the record of any human life is set down, there are always three pair of eyes who see it in a different light. There is the life: (1) As I See It. (2) As Others See It. (3) As God Sees It.

For the first 27 years of my life, I was an atheist or a pagan. I was born in 1962, and my official name is: Chan Kok Wah but now my official name is: Alex Chan Kok Wah. I have no idea, knowledge and information about my infancy period until I was 6 years old. By then, through years of hard labours, I came to know, understand and greatly empathized what is abject poverty, humiliation, being abused, violent situation, notorious environment, hunger, that is, sometimes living without food for a day because in order to have food to eat I have to worked, waking up early in the morning, that is, from 7 a.m. to 11 a.m. on weekend and on weekday, after schooling. I was only 6 years old then, and its continued until I was 15 years old.

Incidentally, I was not living with my family but with my relative. I think this is one of my saddest reminiscence. This is just a small part of the summary because as Sacred Scripture says: if anyone wants to boast, let him boast about the Lord. This is exactly what I must do. Thus, a brief account of where I came from, indicating that God is presence in my life, and indeed, it is considered a blessing from God because I am still alive today. As a result, I believed God preserves all things through His providence.

As it is, I grew up without knowing much about so many things, for examples, speaking properly and with mannerism, writing a message or a letter, even speaking in English language is a major obstacle, etc, etc. When I began to know how to think a little, question like, Does God know what it is to suffer? Does God know anything about being born and not knowing who is my father and mother? and many, many others, but now I called it stupid questions because of God, the Father, the Lord Jesus Christ, mercy and loving-kindness upon me. For "I am nothing and God make me into all things that is good." Amen!

When I was 16 years old till 25 years old, I have had great encountered and experienced enormous outpouring of joy. For instances, and out of a sudden, I started and began to know how to utilized and comprehend a lot of matters that was alien and unknown to me before. Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ! Indeed, "For I am nothing and God makes me into all things that is good."

Human beings reads the face and exterior riches but God reads the heart. Thus, my heart leaped with joy at being invited to His Last Supper. (The Holy Eucharist, or The Holy Mass, or The Holy Communion) even before I was officially baptized. Truly, 'Conversion of heart to God is a form of martyrdom because it involves the surrender of oneself.' - John 21:18-19 - My 'Conversion to Catholic Christian' started when I was unexpectedly facing adversity in my personal life, that is, all my assets pertaining to what I worked for; vanished, when I was abroad. In other words, stolen but it is legally stolen. Many may wonder? Never mind! because this is 'Not' what I want to record and boast.

What I want to boast, is about the Lord Jesus Christ. To be honest, even until today, I am still reluctant to share and boast or announce how and what God had done and provided me with all that is good. Amen! "The greater glory of God" the Father, the Lord Jesus Christ, Son of the living God, and the Holy Spirit is so immensely interfering on my personal life, that is, from when I was born until today. Even though I do not know or hear about God, then. I was granted an experienced of the Lord Jesus Christ healing by a female pastor [Assembly of God] by praying over me. I was indeed, very, very sick at that time and I was only 9 to 12 years old, as I can remembered. Thus, there is no more excuses and no way out for me, except to do the necessary.

Lord Jesus Christ, You know, it is suppose to be an easy task, a joyous and delighted occasion to boast about You, especially, allowing me to encountered and experienced You but it is not so. You know it all, it is because: Firstly, I am a sinner. Secondly, I am stupid, naive, poor, illiterate and uneducated. Thirdly, my thought is always "Not Me" Lord, "You had called the wrong person." But then, You always slowly and patiently guide and teach me until I may comprehend God's will. Oops! that was 27 or 28 years ago, and it is still happening. Marvelous!!

But then, when I seriously come to think of it. My Lord Jesus Christ was a carpenter, that is, when Jesus is fully human and before Jesus is fully mature in wisdom. By implication Jesus is poor, perhaps naive too, and illiterate and uneducated.

Jesus taught the people in their synagogue in such a way that they were astonished and said, 'Where did the man get this wisdom and these miraculous powers? This is the carpenter's son, surely? - Matthew 13:54 -

When the festival was half over, Jesus went to the Temple and began to teach. The Jews were astonished and said, 'How did Jesus learn to read? He has not been taught.'  - John 7:14-15 -

Jesus answered them: 'My teaching is not from myself: it comes from the one who sent me; and if anyone is prepared to do His will, he will know whether my teaching is from God or whether my doctrine is my own. When a man's doctrine is his own he is hoping to get honour for himself; but when he is working for the honour of one who sent him, then he is sincere and by no means an impostor. - John 7:16-18 -

They were astonished at the assurance shown by Peter and John, considering they were uneducated laymen; and they recognised them as associates of Jesus; but when they saw the man who had been cured standing by their side, they could find no answer. - Acts 4:13-14 -

Then again, most of the Lord Jesus Christ apostles, disciples and faithful, are also of the same kind. It is not by the meaning of justifying that it should be as such. No! For instance, Saint Paul is a very literate and educated man, same goes to Saint Luke and many others too. Therefore, this faith of phenomenon gave me great relief.

It was indeed to shame the wise that God chose what is foolish by human reckoning, and to shame what is strong that he chose what is weak by human reckoning; those whom the world thinks common and contemptible are the ones that God has chosen - those who are nothing at all to show up those who are everything. - 1 Cor. 1:27-28 -

At least, now I put in some initiative to do the necessary instead of just doing it on the spiritual education level. I think, if God's willing, I have to reveal how and what the Lord Jesus Christ has had done for me, for the past 54 years and it is still counting. Late is better than never. Yea! The first encountered and experienced I have had with the Lord Jesus Christ was when God sent Edward and Linda, [Singaporean] good and knowledgeable Catholic Christian to be God witnesses, and they presented me a book of Holy Bible/Sacred Scripture. And what happened next was You make me read the whole of Sacred Scripture/Holy Bible, numerous times.

Then, within a year, You directed me to Your church where You are the "Head" that is, Church Of Saint Francis Xavier, Petaling Jaya, Selangor, Malaysia. There, I was advised to attend RCIA class. What amazed me was at that time, Church Of Saint Francis Xavier, the parish priest was Rev. Fr. Jojo M. Fung S.J. and assisted by Rev. Fr. Paul Tan Chee Ing S.J. The amazement was, they were so friendly, humble, and yet intelligent. The love of God which I encountered with both of them gave me the inspiration to further pursue the RCIA class with great excitement. In fact, I was always looking forward to see them. Wow! I scored 100% attendance. Even till today, Rev. Fr. Jojo M. Fung S.J. and Bishop Emeritus, His Grace Bishop Paul Tan Chee Ing S.J. are still great person in the eyes of God, 'the saintly priests.' Amen!

My next God encountered and experienced was the "Holy Eucharist, or Holy Mass, or Holy Communion" and its removed all my negative thoughts and personal problems. The feeling of love, joy, and peace is so great that I never failed to read the Sacred Scripture/Holy Bible everyday. I think it is due to my initial encountered and experienced of God. - Luke 24:13-35 - The Lord Jesus Christ appearances are clearly at the heart of the early Christian belief. The consistent witness of the New Testament, [Sacred Scripture/Holy Bible] is that, in the appearances of Jesus Christ, something incredible happened to Cleopas and a friend. (Jesus followers and believers) This phenomenon is precisely how and what I have had experienced and encountered the Lord Jesus Christ. Truly, truly, and later, I was Baptized and Confirmed in this scenario and manner. That is, recognised the Lord Jesus Christ at the breaking of bread. - Luke 24:13-35 - AMEN! I was 'Baptised and Confirmed' on the 14th April 1990. Before I was 'Baptised and Confirmed.' I was an atheist or a free thinker or an idolatry.

Then Jesus said to them, 'You foolish men! So slow to believe the full message of the prophets! Was it not ordained that the Christ should suffer and so enter onto his glory?' Then, starting with Moses and going through all the prophets, he explained to them the passages throughout the scriptures that were about himself.

When they drew near to the village to which they were going, he made as if to go on; but they pressed him to stay with them. 'It is nearly evening' they said 'and the day is almost over.' So he went in to stay with them. Now while he was with them at table, he took the bread and said the blessing; then he broke it and handed it to them. And their eyes were opened and they recognised him; but he had vanished from their sight. Then they said to each other, 'Did not our hearts burn within us as he talked to us on the road and explained the scriptures to us?' - Luke 24:25-32 -

If God's willing, the remaining years of my life on earth will be all on boasting of the Lord Jesus Christ. Unbelievably, I think even with the next 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, it is still insufficient to do all the boasting of God because the Lord Jesus Christ has never stop but keep pouring His gifts upon me. There are many gifts which I do not bother and may have forgotten about it. "Have mercy on me, Lord Jesus Christ" for it is all inadvertent. Truly, truly, when God said:

Seek Yahweh while he is still to be found,
call to him while he is still near.
Let the wicked man abandon his way,
the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn back to Yahweh who will take pity on him,
to our God who is rich in forgiving;
for my thoughts are not your thoughts,
my ways not your ways - it is Yahweh who speaks.
Yes, the heavens are as high above earth
as my ways are above your ways,
my thoughts above your thoughts.

Yes, as the rain and the snow come down from the heavens and do not return without watering the earth, making it yield and giving growth to provide seed for the sower and bread for the eating, so the word that goes from my mouth does not return to me empty, without carrying out my will and succeeding in what it was sent to do. - Is. 55:6-11 -

Thank You, Lord Jesus Christ, because "I am nothing and You make me into all things that is good." In other words, if there are great deeds which I have had performed whether it is visible or invisible, tangible or intangible, I knows that it is because of the Holy Spirit that moves me, thus it is never belong to me and it did not come from me either because I am just a mere instrument. "The Lord's instrument."

"All praises and thanksgiving to you, Lord Jesus Christ."

"For the Lord Jesus Christ did not send me to baptise, but to preach the Good News, and not to preach that in the terms of philosophy in which the crucifixion of Christ cannot be expressed. The language of the cross may be illogical to those who are not on the way to salvation, but those of us who are on the way to see it as God's power to save. As scripture says: I shall destroy the wisdom of the wise and bring to nothing all the learning of the learned. Where are the philosophers now? Where are the scribes? Where are any of our thinkers today? Do you see now how God has shown up the foolishness of human wisdom? If it was God's wisdom that human wisdom should not know God, it was because God wanted to save those who have faith through the foolishness of the message that we preach. And so, while the Jews demand miracles and the Greeks look for wisdom, here are we preaching a crucified Christ; to the Jews an obstacle that they cannot get over, to the pagans madness, but to those who have been called, whether they are Jews or Greeks, a Christ who is the power and the wisdom of God. For God foolishness is wiser than human wisdom, and God's weakness is stronger than human strength.

Take for yourselves for instance, brothers, at the time when you were called: how many of you were wise in the ordinary sense of the word, how many were influential people, or came from noble families? No, it was to shame the wise that God chose what is foolish by human reckoning, and to shame what is strong that he chose what is weak by human reckoning; those whom the world thinks common and contemptible are the ones that God has chosen - those who are nothing at all to show up those who are everything. The human race has nothing to boast about to God, but you God has made members of Christ Jesus and by God's doing he has become our wisdom, and our virtue, and our holiness, and our freedom. As scripture says: if anyone wants to boast, let him boast about the Lord." - 1 Cor. 1:17-31 - 

With all these in mind, I am grateful to God for all His blessing and the Lord Jesus Christ blessings to come. Amen! In fact, I have did an in-depth study of myself for many years. Then, reflected and contemplated on my own life, the past, the current and what the future will be? Daily pondering as well. Lastly, I have had some serious contemplation of my own life, the past, the current, and the future. Consequently, I came to my senses and not only realizing what the Lord Jesus Christ has done great things for me, the Lord, actually has been my "Savior" all this while. Seriously, if I have not know God and live without the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ, I am already a dead man. Perhaps, long time ago. Indeed, "I am nothing and God makes me into all things that is good."

Of course, God, the Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ calls, and touches everyone or every human beings, whether it is in a small way, big way, and profound way. Thus, whether the one who was touched by God or encountered or experienced God, is willing to response His called is questionable? Because God, the Creator give every human beings, the freedom to choose. As a result, I have save myself from this perverse generation and remain faithful to the teaching of the apostles. [Didache]  That is, Tradition, Sacred Scripture, Magisterium. Thanks be to God.

But as we have the same spirit of faith that is mentioned in scripture - I believed, and therefore I spoke - we too believe and therefore we too speak, knowing that he who raised the Lord Jesus to life will raise us with Jesus in our turn, and put us by his side and you with us. You see, all this is for your benefit, so that the more grace is multiplied among people, the more thanksgiving there will be, to the glory of God. - 2 Cor. 4:13-15 -

Today, and in time to come, it is a great joy to me, in the Lord Jesus Christ because there is nothing I cannot master with the help of God, the Lord Jesus Christ who gives me strength, wisdom, knowledge, understanding, courage, and most importantly, love. Indeed, I have learnt to manage on whatever I have, I know how to be poor and I know how to be rich too. I have been through my initiation and now I am ready for anything, anywhere: full stomach or empty stomach, poverty or plenty. AMEN!

"All praises and thanksgiving to you, Lord Jesus Christ."

                                                             Page 1

Wishing you, 'Happy Reading', and may God, the Father, the Son of the living God, Jesus Christ, fills your heart, mind, thoughts, and grants you: The Holy Spirit, that is, Wisdom, Knowledge, Understanding, Counsel, Piety, Fortitude, Fear of the Lord, and also His fruits of the Holy Spirit, that is, Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Trustfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control. Amen! God blessing be upon you!

If we live by the truth and in love, we shall grow in all ways into Christ Jesus, who is the head by whom the whole body is fitted and joined together, every joint adding its own strength, for each separate part to work according to it function, so the body grows until it has built itself up, in love. - Ephesians 4:15-16 - 

I STILL HAVE MANY THINGS TO SAY TO YOU BUT THEY WOULD BE TOO MUCH FOR YOU NOW. BUT WHEN THE SPIRIT OF TRUTH COMES, HE WILL LEAD YOU TO THE COMPLETE TRUTH, SINCE HE WILL NOT BE SPEAKING AS FROM HIMSELF, BUT WILL SAY ONLY WHAT HE HAS LEARNT; AND HE WILL TELL YOU OF THE THINGS TO COME.

HE WILL GLORIFY ME, SINCE ALL HE TELLS YOU WILL BE TAKEN FROM WHAT IS MINE. EVERYTHING THE FATHER HAS IS MINE; THAT IS WHY I SAID: ALL HE TELLS YOU WILL BE TAKEN FROM WHAT IS MINE. - JOHN 16:12-15 -                              

 Thank You for donating, your generous contribution is profoundly cherish. God bless.                 Bank transfer / cheque deposit: Name: Alex Chan Kok Wah                                                                       Bank: Public Bank Berhad account no: 4076577113                                                                                   Country: Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

I have through years of reading, pondering, reflecting and contemplating, the 3 things that last; FAITH . HOPE . LOVE and I would like to made available my sharing from the many thinkers, authors, scholars and theologians whose ideas and thoughts I have borrowed. God be with them always. Amen!